Bankruptcy of the soul.

So today I learned that filing for bankruptcy is my only hope to get my finances in order.

I cannot find anyone who will move in with me to help me with my bills. I am alone in this.

I cannot find anyone who cares to even understand what a setback this is. I am alone in this.

I cannot find the strength to find hope in spite of this. I have lost.

I cannot understand how I could be so stupid as to let this happen. I am unfit and unworthy of the precious chances I've bee given.

I survived horrible things in my life. I survived an emotionally abusive childhood. I survived teenage drug addiction and angst hell bent on self destruction. I've never been brave enough to be happy.

I survived cancer. A lesson is random acts of pain.

I survived realizing life was Hobbes-a-rific. My life is, in a phrase, solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and far too fucking long.

I am the maker of my own fate -- and this time I have chosen to fail.

Forward.

God knows where MISSISSIPPI.

I fucking hate Texas. I fucking hate the far awayness of it. Mississippi refuses to end. I hate it hate it hate it hate it.

God I hate it. I'm driving at 75mph. I should stop this post now.

God I hate it.

Non sum qualis eram

warhammer online is the only thing keeping me attached to anything. I have a feeling this is bad. I voted. obama for my future. please vote, your voice makes the chorus all the more beautiful...


The future is now. I am one with my cliche.

O

Obama for the win. Real change and real cheese. He's coming to Indiana on Thursday, I'm volunteering for his campaign tomorrow evening. I hope to hear him speak.

O glorious day.

I am vibrant

It's 5:33 am.

the world must know i'm vibrant.

the body is weak

the mind is strong.

solo and clear.

Forward.

I just have to say Palin is an idiot

It's important to note, at this time, that Sarah Palin scares the living shit out of me.

I know they're behind. I know the American people probably see's through her shit -- but my god -- the bitch is scary.


Thought I'd share.

True Blood

So I've started watching some fucked up show call True Blood. So far it's freaking lame as hell. I don't reccomend it.

It begins

I find that I love the idea of sharing my thoughts with people far more than actually sharing them. It's quite bizarre for me, the way that works. I think -- wow, wouldn't it be cool to keep an online journal and just chronicle what it is I observe or babble on about daily. And I say to myself, YES -- that would be badass!

And then I'm required to actually do it.

Sloth overtakes.